“Oh no… do we really have to go back to my childhood to fix this?” “Can’t we do this any other way?”
I often hear this, like now, when we sit down to set leadership goals for my CEO client. She feels she could bring a lot more out of her team. In our session the obstacles show themselves and they too originate in her childhood.
Early negative programming happens, well, early. But why? How can messages stick with us for decades?!
When we think back to our childhood we think of ourselves as the same person but smaller. This is not true in so many ways. One important difference is we are in a trance state between 2 and 7 years of age. I mean in actual trance: our minds use a different brainwave frequency (theta and then alpha) then what it uses right now (beta). This puts us in a hypnotic state and our parents try to hypnotize us everyday to behave as they feel its right and to believe what they want to believe.
By age 7 we know who we are and what life is like. We learn like a sponge in the trance years, that is the evolutionary purpose of this altered state. This also means we pick up stuff that does not help us - but help them, to control us. Negative core beliefs like “children should be seen and not heard” or “you should be grateful for this punishment, its for your own good”. Or that “it’s not up to me, children have no say in this” - as in the case of my client.
Yes, we all made the most of our childhood, we’ve learned to hide our feelings, we picked up heavy shields and armor and we survived. Congratulations! - and I mean it. You are here. You survived. You have a good life. And now you want to have a great life.
So now, 20-30-40 years later you have to put that armor down and start being vulnerable if you want to have genuine connections to others. And last time I checked, this is the key to a long and happy life!
It’s time to break the parental hypnosis. The fun starts after we take responsibility and start living. In a way its time to grow up.
My client learned that contrary to previous belief, it IS up to her, really. And we are not talking about learning on a conscious/beta level. In our sessions we use the same creative space from our childhood to overwrite the negative beliefs.
After our sessions she started to show up differently in her company, to be present, be vulnerable, and started making decisions. And her team started to perform as she always knew they could.
If you have a hunch that something inside you limits your own growth, or your company’s growth: hit reply and send me a note!